Plan for a successful school year by planting intentional thoughts

Is your child excited about the upcoming school year, are they a bundle of nerves, or are they dreading going back to school?  I have a first-time college-bound teen experiencing a mix of emotions so it’s possible that you might have that too. Your child could be excited to see friends, but nervous about a new teacher, new sport or activities, or having schoolwork and homework again.

As parents, we can want to reassure our kids that they’re going to be fine and that there’s nothing to worry about, but if you’ve been reading my blogs over the past few weeks you know that this can actually heighten their nervousness.  When we accept and affirm that it’s normal to be nervous, our kids are more likely to remain open to talking to us. We want to keep them open so we can introduce some intentional thoughts and plant thought seeds for a successful school year.

This isn't the first time I've dealt with mixed emotions about school — when my daughter was in elementary school, she was consistently placed in classes without any of her close friends.  As school approached, we talked about her disappointment at not being with her friends, and we came up with ideas and plans for what she could do to stay close to them.

I also talked to her about what she could do to get to know the new kids in her class, and I kept repeating how good she was at making new friends and how easy it was for her.  I wanted her to think intentional thoughts to help make it easier.  I knew that how she thought about the situation affected how easy or hard it was, so I worked to intentionally plant thought-seeds to set her up for success. 

Our brains are very literal.  When we think something is going to be hard, our brains will filter to make it harder for us.  When we think something is going to be easy, our brains will be open to — and filter for — solutions to help make it easier.

When our kids think I can’t handle this, I don’t know what to do, or This is so hard, their brains will work to prove those thoughts true.  But when we plant intentional thought-seeds of I can handle this, I can figure this out, and This will be easy, our kid’s brains will work to filter and prove those thoughts to be true.

Because my kids are older, I've had the opportunity to see how this all worked out in the long run.  Those thought seeds that I planted in elementary school about how easy it was for my daughter to make new friends served her very well over the years.  She developed very strong social skills with the ability to successfully navigate and easily integrate into new situations which is making her college transition much easier. 

I invite you to consider the intentional thought-seeds you can plant to help set your kids up for a successful new year.  Remember, the key will be to accept what they are feeling and experiencing first so they stay open, and then plant a new intentional thought.

Communication is KEY to easier parenting and a better relationship with your kids.  The Parent’s Back To School Survival Guide helps guide you through how to communicate to avoid miserable mornings, homework headaches, and so much more.  Click here to grab your copy.